Listening to: nothing
Drinking: Dr. Pepper (What else?! lol)
As you all know, I've been apart of your lives for a number of years, and come to love and charish me as a friend (those who do so). So.. It's my job as a friend to not hide secrets. Ok. Some are ok but... yeah...
I suffer from an undiagnosed Split Personallity. Might be a shock to some. but here's what is going to hurt me the most to tell you guys...
I'm the Second personality. I'm.. Not real... I'm only as real as I am as a personality. I am a ghost in a shell.... and sadly... the shell... is a man. I'm the pinnical of irony. A girl.. wanting to be real... being trapped in a man's body and unable to be real. The real personality has all but given up himself and has pretty much left me in charge... It depresses me every day to look in the mirror and expect to see myself, but see his face.
But... there you have it.. The thing that will hurt me the most telling you guys.. the thing that's going to stress me the most. I love each and every one of you as my friends and what's been going down in my life has fucked me over so much that... I have to tell ya'll. I'm out of options about where to stay... I'm near the end of the rope for my current job... I'm just so scared now... and now... I'm coming to you guys... I... have to girl up.
Look... I'll answer any questions you guys'll have. Privately. No need to share to the randoms about your oppinion.. unless you want too.
I'm sure one of the biggest will be "But I HEARD your voice!"Yes. That's me. 100%. I've developped my own voice apart from the primary personality.
I never told you the truth because I see myself as a female and wish to be one. Even though I'm trapped like this...
Some of you who follow me on Facebook already know this since I posted it a week or so ago...